Ask a Stand-Up Comedian
Have you always wanted to know the secrets to life? To a happy relationship? How to drive the big rigs and experience the fulfilling career you've always wanted?
No one affiliated with this Web site knows any of those things, but if you send in your questions, we'll be glad to answer them in a completely useless and at times cosmically insulting way. WARNING: These columns get raunchy sometimes. Read at your own risk.
I'm currently 15 and aspire to be a comedian. What advice would you give a
young kid wanting to make people laugh for a living? Any suggestions?
--Bryan Reisberg
Adam Ruben: A legit question (our first, hooray!) deserves a legit response. Here's one.
First, be aware that very few of us on this site make people laugh for a living. Almost all of us would like to, but the fact is, we get paid so little and so sporadically that we have to do other stuff in the meantime. So my first piece of advice: Don't drop out of anything. Don't alter any career plans, and don't burn any bridges. Do as much comedy as you can in your free time, but don't abandon other sources of income until you ARE making enough to do so. (Even the professionals, before they got big, worked for a few years while still getting their routines straight and drumming up support.)
Second: As soon as you can, start performing at thankless open mic shows. And I do mean thankless: You never get paid, you only get to perform 5 minutes (8 if you're lucky), and for some clubs (in New York especially), you actually have to bring some number of paying guests. Open mics are the only way to jump into this business, and there's no quicker way to learn about comedy than to get stage time. Look through the clubs on dcstandup.com (if you live in the area), find one with an open mic night, and go to it. Make calls and see if you can get on stage that night. Perform. It may suck big ones, but if it does, you'll learn right away what to work on. My first performance (shudder) was a string of bad math puns. ("I tried to figure out how much alcohol my mouthwash contained, but the proof was beyond the text of this Scope!") It was awful. So I learned a valuable lesson: No math puns.
Third: Make connections. At these open mic things, introduce yourself to every comic you meet. Not only are we nice people (except that asshole Chris White), but we may know of other stuff going on in the area. If we like ya, we can help ya out.
So that's my advice to you, o budding comic. Good luck in your endeavours, and maybe someday I'll see you perform at some crappy show at the Zoo Bar.