And Featuring ... Rob Maher
Rob Maher is a homegrown talent, having developed much of his brash, no-holds-barred routine at the open mics of DC, Virginia and Maryland. Crowds up and down the East Coast have come to respect his reputation as a fearless comedian, but from May 26-28 he'll be close to home, performing as the feature act at the Baltimore Comedy Factory with headliner Retta. He chatted with Dcstandup's Chris White over e-mail.
You started your career right here in Northern Virginia. What was it that pushed you onto the stage for the first time?
I'd wanted to do stand up for a while, so I started writing material and then performing it in front of my friend and his band after their practice each week. It wasn't like performing in front of total strangers, but it did give me a little experience using a mic and it helped my confidence. I then went to a comedy show one night in Front Royal, Va., where I saw the legendary Fat Doctor perform. I talked to him and the feature, Steve Sabo, after the show. They were very cool to me as I went on about how I wanted to try stand-up. The Fat Doctor told me to come back the next night and he'd put me on for 5 minutes. I was scared to death but I did end up coming back. I did my 5 minutes and it went pretty well. The Fat Doctor told me he didn't think it was my first time on stage before, so I took that as a compliment. I left that night thinking, wow, I might be able to do this. A few weeks later a friend of mine told me about Wiseacres. I went up there with a bunch of friends one night and I've been going back ever since. That first night at Wiseacres I met Andy Kline and Mike Payne and a whole bunch of other comics who I've gone on to become great friends with. Years later, I featured at Wiseacres for none other than ... the Fat Doctor. Needless to say, it was a pretty cool moment for me.
Some of your act is pretty raw -- you're certainly not afraid to cross any lines with the audience. Did you start out that way, or did that aspect of your performances evolve over time?
I started probably too raw. Some might say I'm still too raw. Over the years I've learned that saying a line or a joke with a certain level of confidence allows you to push it more. If you act as if you're saying something too controversial the crowd will sense that and pull back from you. Its not really about crossing lines with me, though, or being clean or being dirty. To me it’s either funny or it isn't.
That sounds like it has the potential to be a dangerous learning process from time to time -- has anyone in the audience ever taken a swing?
Nothing that extreme. It’s more the mood of the crowd changes. I did have a woman at Wiseacres open mic night once get mad at me though. I had just gotten off stage, and as I was walking back past the bar I overheard her ask Mike Diesel, the booker, “You think he's funny?” Mike said yeah, and she went on about how all I did was objectify women, and all I do is talk about tits and ass. She said this as I walked by, so it was obvious she wanted me to hear it. I stopped and started to debate her, but all she wanted to do was yell at me. Mike told me to just walk away and not listen to her. I walked about 10 feet and then stopped, turned around and said, "Oh by the way, nice tits." Yes, I'm a dick. If she had come up to me after the show and said she had a problem with my act I would have respectfully disagreed with her and that would have been that. Since it didn't happen that way, I might as well amuse myself and mess with her. Plus she gets to go home thinking she was right about me all along.
Are there any topics that you’d like to explore on stage that you haven’t had the chance to just yet?
There are a few bits of mine or topics that I know I could get laughs with if I had the clout of an A Room Headliner. Hopefully I'll be able to use them one day.
Care to give us a preview? Even a hint?
Well, I do a couple bits now from time to time that I think I could do all the time if I had more clout. One is about making a woman think you’re gay to get closer to her, only to try to get with her once she's gotten close to you. Another is about how women could rule the world if they just slept their way to the top. Women always talk about how guys let sex run their life and how guys only think with their dicks, yet all they seem to do with this knowledge is get a few free drinks from time to time. All it takes is one woman to run topless for president and she'd be in the Oval Office. If just one generation of women decided to use sex to get to the top, guys would never recover. Women would rule the world.
Any subjects you won't touch with a 10-foot pole?
I try to stay away from politics. People are so divided right now and so set in their beliefs, its hard to go down that road without rubbing a lot of people the wrong way.
Comedians sometimes become a bit jaded or desensitized to comedy (probably from overexposure). What or who still makes you laugh out loud?
Brian Regan kills me every time. Dave Attell, Chris Rock, Dave Chappelle, Bobby Slayton always get me laughing.
Stand-up sometimes leads to other opportunities -- you were a game host for the Washington Capitals, right? Any good stories?
It was the best job I ever had. I got to go to every game that year, plus I got two free tickets in the lower level to give to my friends each game. I was a very popular guy that year. I remember one night it was this little kid’s birthday. He had to be about 4 or 5. I got the entire arena to sing “Happy Birthday” to him. As they finished singing I put the mic in front of the kid, hoping he would do something funny/cute. He just sat there for a second as everyone silently waited for him, and then in the cutest, most sincere and genuine voice he simply said thank you. The entire crowd went awwwe. You couldn't have scripted it better. I know you were probably expecting more of a “I had sex with a girl on a Zamboni” story but I'm more than just a womanizing misogynist. I also like to exploit children to entertain crowds. After every game we would always go across the street to the Chop House. One night I ran into Olie Kolzig, the Caps goalie, over there. I go up to him and begin to introduce myself. He stops me and says, I know who you are. I see you every night on the jumbotron. I felt important for the rest of the night.
You also have reviewed movies on TV. What's the greatest movie of all time?
That was another cool job. The best movie I reviewed was probably "Gladiator." My favorite movie of all time is "Shawshank Redemption."
Wait -- what about "Punchline"? It's so realistic.
I wanted to like “Punchline” but no one in it is funny. It would be like watching a porno starring me. “Comedian” is great, though.
For the last question you get an open mic. Anything you'd like to tell the readers?
I get a lot of comics asking me about crowd work because I tend to incorporate it into every set. I used to be afraid of talking to the crowd but as I've gotten more comfortable on stage I've gotten more confident in talking to the crowd. I think it's a skill every comic has. The reason we decided to be a comic in the first place isn't because we had all these great bits written, it's because we were funny off the cuff with our friends or at work. We all essentially started off doing crowd work, just not amongst strangers. It's easier to be funny around your friends because you're comfortable around them. The more comfortable you get on stage the more you allow yourself to get laughs by doing crowd work. All you're really doing is tapping into your natural talent, the thing that made you realize you were funny in the first place.
Rob Maher is at the Baltimore Comedy Factory May 26-28. For more information, visit www.baltimorecomedy.com.